It's not a plane, It's SUPER BRIDE!

The one time in my life I want to be knock-out gorgeous, my looks go down the crapper! And I just realized after trying on lingerie the other day, how pale I am. Is it bad if the bride glows in the dark? Bum bum bum, trying to be sexy, Shabam! GLOWING NUDITY. Hot. Sooo anyways, I feel like a legit wedding planner. I mean I am crossing off my huge list of things to do at amazing speeds. I am basically a comic book character, I'm that good.

And humble.

Today I had a dress fitting, my first one. The only problem: Zee dress is a wee tight around the tire. Apparently those christmas cookies and junkies were not carrots and celery. Who knew. And my dietician always told me there is no such thing as bad foods. I call BULL, been calling it for years. They just wanted to fatten me up. Alas, wedding dress says otherwise. Lose weight. Yes Ma'am. So the new goal: In 2.5 weeks, I am eating very healthy, exercising on that blasted AbCircle Pro, and dancing my butt off with DDR. Don't most brides do this months before the wedding? I am a little late about getting into shape. I blame it on the dietitian. Washboard abs...prepare to meet Glowing Nudity!

*Note on the AbCircle Pro: I don't believe I have it set up right. Last night while flying around on it to Lady Gaga, the knees went flying off the machine, resulting in a not so graceful belly flop atop uncomfortable machine. Was that not supposed to happen? How come they never show Jennifer Nicole Lee flying off the back of the AbCircle Pro whilst grasping onto handlebars for dear life. I need to work on my dismount.